Embracing my embarrassment

‘Well, thank you very much,’ a dear friend let me know sarcastically. After I mentioned the actor Robson Green, she spent a whole weekend watching a complete season of Grantchester. Of course, the poor thing couldn’t help herself. But I bet she was smiling. And so was I.

I had been watching two episodes of Grantchester, when I asked her if she knew who Robson Green was. He was doctor Tony Hill in Wire in the Blood. I wondered what he looked like back then, and Google is always helpful by all means. A bit too helpful. Typing his name first, I wanted to add the name of the TV series, but Google suggested something else: ‘Robson Green swimming.’
‘Uhm.., sure,’ so I was shown an endless list of images of a bare-chested Robson Green. And I found the making of Grantchester season two, which I watched. More than once. (The link of the swimming scene with him and James Norton can be found below. If I had put it right here, I was afraid you wouldn’t want to finish reading this article.)
I wondered if I was really this silly, and quickly cleared the history of the computer. What would my partner be thinking if he found out? My face turns a brighter shade of red than my hair is, sharing this with you.
What the dickens? I have far bigger problems regarding my health and future (because of ME, which is madness really). My partner would probably laugh if he found out I had been ogling the two main characters of this television drama. So what? Life is tough enough as it is.
Regardless the nature of our worries, knowing we all have things on our minds, I have a suggestion. With the risk of appearing superficial, not being mindful or even being called a sexist, when worried: watch Robson Green! Or George Clooney, Clive Owen, Idris Elba, Denzel Washington, or James Norton. Just give in to this mindless way of relaxation.
This year the third season of Grantchester will be broadcasted. Yes! And no more shame is my New Year’s resolution for 2017. I decided to embrace my embarrassment. No longer do I want to keep up appearances, hoping to be seen as an educated, well-balanced, almost forty year old woman. No, no, no, no, I am neither flawless, nor that boring. The hell with it.

Normally, when my partner takes me out in the wheelchair it lasts fifteen minutes tops, simply because of my stamina. But all that will be forgotten when I go outside with my dear friend and we bump into Robson Green. I am convinced she would not abandon me, leaving me helplessly in the middle of the street just to pursue him.
And she might be small, but I expect her to be strong enough to pick up speed while pushing me in the wheelchair so the two of us can chase the heartthrob. Yes, we would be quite a sight, with me hanging on for dear life, but yelling at the same time for my friend to go faster. Best. Embarrassment. Ever.

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This post is also available in: Dutch

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